He is...

“I am the gate; whoever enters through me will be saved. He will come in and go out, and find pasture.”                                                                                                               John 10.9

Jesus makes it clear that He is the way. I know this and I believe it. But, right now, I’m struggling. I think I’m looking to find my further way in Him. I am involved in ministry, and quite a variety of it. I think this is right. I feel for the whole body and it does not seem wrong for me to be in touch with, and minister to, many parts of God’s family. But I wonder just what I’m doing. Am I doing all that He has for me, and that He wants me to be doing freely and joyfully? Is there more?

I question much modern prophecy. I see manifestations of the Spirit, some of which appear quite strange. I ask, “Why? What is this all for? I’ve seen all this before, but why do I not see more?”

What’s going on? Am I becoming (or am I perhaps already) a cynic? How might God bring me to a place of more faith?

I think He’s making the way clear to me today. God’s way is through Jesus. If I desire to see God’s greater works in my life, I need more of Jesus. Jesus said it simply, “Come, follow me.” Do I know everything I might about Jesus? I think not! I think I’m being called to get deeper into Him, to learn more about Him and also to get closer to Him. It’s not simply a case of learning about Him. He said if I have faith in Him I will do greater things than He did. If I desire God’s Holy Spirit to be active in my life, I need to live more with Jesus. As I seek Jesus the Holy Spirit will come.

I have myself received a variety of experiences in the Holy Spirit, including some rather bizarre ones. I do not deny or discredit these things. But I want more. I want the greater manifestations of God’s power at work for good in the world today. I want to see people’s lives changed dramatically as God’s power draws them into real and abiding relationship. Yes, that’s it. The aim is relationship. Of course, Jesus is the key. He is the gate. Yes, I know Him. But I want to know Him more. I can but seek Him and ask for His help.

Holy God,

I love You so much, and I feel so unworthy of Your love right now. I feel that I am doubting of much of the supernatural that seems to be abroad in the body. I confess this. I ask Your pardon and forgiveness, but I also seek Your help. I want to believe. O God, I so want to believe.

I am sometimes cynical of “prophecies” Help me in this, Lord. If these words are truly from You please enable me to receive, believe and even get excited at what comes forth.

Forgive me, Lord, when I see evidence of the Spirit on individuals and I am tempted to think ‘Here we go again.’ Forgive me and lead me further into Your truth. I am so committed to the spiritual, the supernatural. Yet I sense this cynicism and scepticism in me. Lord, if this is of You, please show me why I feel it and what You would have me do about it. If it’s not of You, I ask You to take it away from me.

I want to get closer to You. Draw me in, please. As Jesus reminds me He is the gate so, today, I consciously open wide that gate, along with my heart, and I invite You into greater habitation in me. I surrender my unbelief to You. I also give You what belief I have and I ask You to increase it.

I want You, first and foremost, in close and intimate loving relationship. But I also desire to share Your love – widely and deeply. I yearn to see miracles and signs and wonders unfold as I share my faith in You.

I can but give myself to You. I do that now. Take me, and have Your way fully in me. I ask this in Jesus’ precious name.               Amen.

My book “God Talk” is available through major Internet booksellers.

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